This song blows my mind like I can't even explain.
mewithoutYou - "the King Beetle on a Coconut Estate"
As the Moon rose and the hour grew late, the day help on a Coconut estate raked up the dry leaves that fell dead from the Trees, which they burned in a pile by the lake. The Beetle King summoned his men, and from the top of the Rhododendron stem: "Calling all volunteers who can carry back here, the Great Mystery’s been lit once again." One Beetle emerged from the crowd in a fashionable abdomen shroud, and said: "I’m a Professor, you see, that’s no mystery to me... I’ll be back soon, successful and proud." But when the Beetle Professor returned he crawled on all six, as his wings had been burned, and described to the finest detail all he’d learned. There was neither a light nor a heat in his words. The deeply dissatisfied King climbed the same stem to announce the same thing, but in his second appeal sought to sweeten the deal with a silver Padparadscha ring. The Lieutenant stepped out from the line as he lassoed his thorax with twine, thinking: "I’m stronger and braver and I’ll earn the King’s favor. One day all he has will be mine!" But for all the Lieutenant’s conceit he, too, returned singed and admitting defeat: "I had no choice, please believe, but retreat... it was bright as the sun, but with ten times the heat! And it cracked like the thunder and bloodshot my eyes, though smothered with sticks it advanced undeterred. Carelessly cast an ash cloud to the sky, my Lord, like a flock of dark, vanishing birds."
The Beetle King slammed down his fist: "Your flowery description’s no better than his! We sent for the Great Light and you bring us this? We didn’t ask what it seems like, we asked what it IS!" His Majesty’s hour at last has drawn nigh! The elegant Queen took her leave from his side, without understanding but without asking why, gathered their Kids to come bid their goodbyes. And the father explained: "You’ve been somewhat deceived... We’ve all called me your dad, but your True Dad’s not me. I lay next to your mom when your forms were conceived, but your Father is the Life within all that you see. He fills up the ponds as He empties the clouds, holds without hands and He speaks without sounds, provides us with the Cow’s waste and coconuts to eat, giving one that nice salt-taste and the other a sweet. Sends the black carriage the day Death shows its face, thinning our numbers with Kindness and Grace. And just as a Flower and its Fragrance are one so must each of you and your Father become. Now distribute my scepter, my crown and my throne and all we’ve known as ‘wealth’ to the poor and alone." Without further hesitation and without looking back home, the King flew headlong into the blazing unknown! And as the Smoke King curled higher and higher, the troops, flying loops ’round the telephone wires, said: "Our Beloved’s not dead, but His Highness instead has been utterly changed into Fire!"
Why not be utterly changed into Fire?
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
From Mom
I realize I haven't written a blog since before Norah was born. Life has been busy but amazing. I'm not even sure what I should write about or where to start.
As you read from Marshall's blog, the labor and birth of Norah was a positive experience and given the opportunity, I don't think we would change one bit of it. I had hoped for a waterbirth, but I am more than content with how Norah and I (and Dad!) were able to manage the 9 hours of labor and the 20 minutes of transition. Transition happened so fast, there was no time to prep the tub - and I couldn't even wrap my mind around how I was going to carry myself from the bed to the tub. Just a few comments in response to some general questions I've been asked:
Pain. This is a huge topic and buzz word surrounding childbirth. My experience was NOT painful. The surges (or contractions) I experienced during the 9 hours were extremely manageable, which I attribute to hypnobirthing and the use of different laboring techniques (jacuzzi, shower, birthing ball, etc.). Once the bag of waters was broken, things definitely got more intense but I still can't label what I was feeling as pain. I've retold our experience many times to people, and the only word that seems to fit that last 20 minutes when I was pushing is INTENSE. And to label how I felt after Norah was born - RELIEVED! (I do believe I made the remark, "I'm good with only having one child"...HAHA!)
Breastfeeding. Yes, I believe breastfeeding is natural and that God gave women breasts for a reason (not just for sexual attraction). So, I feel like I should use them! However, I've experienced firsthand that just because breastfeeding is natural does not mean that it is easy! Breastfeeding WAS PAINFUL the first week or so. My nipples have begun to hurt less, but I'm producing more milk than Norah can take in (moderate-to-serve engorgement). It's somewhat painful, highly uncomfortable, and super frustrating. I've been pumping and putting the excess milk in the freezer. We definitely have a good supply started and I am literally counting down the days until we are able to introduce a bottle. Norah and I have also been struggling with positioning (she only wants to eat in one position - with me laying down). This struggle is not conducive to having company or leaving our home to run errands. But yes, I know, this too shall pass. And yes, practice, practice, practice! We are both hanging in there, and I know the health benefits of breastfeeding outweigh any frustrations we may encounter.
Norah is sleeping beside me as I write this blog. I can't stop staring at her. She is so precious and perfect. How was this little one inside of me for 10 months? How did God know I would love her so much right away? Is she capable of loving us right away? How am I ever going to be a good mom? Whew, it is all a bit overwhelming, but God knew Marshall and I needed Norah in our lives. I'm so humbled by his graciousness and know I need to strive to be a better woman for Marshall...and now for Norah.
Norah's Grandma Wiley arrives tonight! HOORAY! Marshall is currently in route to pick her up from the Boston Airport. I am so excited and can hardly focus on anything. I know my mom is going to be a bundle of emotions when she meets Norah. She has been talking about her visit ever since we booked the tickets (over a couple of months ago). Her only baby now has a baby of her own. We will make sure to post pictures of her visit!
I hope you all are well. I just want to say a special thank you here to all of the people who have extended their support to us. We are so blessed to have you all in our lives.
Love to you all.
SLK
As you read from Marshall's blog, the labor and birth of Norah was a positive experience and given the opportunity, I don't think we would change one bit of it. I had hoped for a waterbirth, but I am more than content with how Norah and I (and Dad!) were able to manage the 9 hours of labor and the 20 minutes of transition. Transition happened so fast, there was no time to prep the tub - and I couldn't even wrap my mind around how I was going to carry myself from the bed to the tub. Just a few comments in response to some general questions I've been asked:
Pain. This is a huge topic and buzz word surrounding childbirth. My experience was NOT painful. The surges (or contractions) I experienced during the 9 hours were extremely manageable, which I attribute to hypnobirthing and the use of different laboring techniques (jacuzzi, shower, birthing ball, etc.). Once the bag of waters was broken, things definitely got more intense but I still can't label what I was feeling as pain. I've retold our experience many times to people, and the only word that seems to fit that last 20 minutes when I was pushing is INTENSE. And to label how I felt after Norah was born - RELIEVED! (I do believe I made the remark, "I'm good with only having one child"...HAHA!)
Breastfeeding. Yes, I believe breastfeeding is natural and that God gave women breasts for a reason (not just for sexual attraction). So, I feel like I should use them! However, I've experienced firsthand that just because breastfeeding is natural does not mean that it is easy! Breastfeeding WAS PAINFUL the first week or so. My nipples have begun to hurt less, but I'm producing more milk than Norah can take in (moderate-to-serve engorgement). It's somewhat painful, highly uncomfortable, and super frustrating. I've been pumping and putting the excess milk in the freezer. We definitely have a good supply started and I am literally counting down the days until we are able to introduce a bottle. Norah and I have also been struggling with positioning (she only wants to eat in one position - with me laying down). This struggle is not conducive to having company or leaving our home to run errands. But yes, I know, this too shall pass. And yes, practice, practice, practice! We are both hanging in there, and I know the health benefits of breastfeeding outweigh any frustrations we may encounter.
Norah is sleeping beside me as I write this blog. I can't stop staring at her. She is so precious and perfect. How was this little one inside of me for 10 months? How did God know I would love her so much right away? Is she capable of loving us right away? How am I ever going to be a good mom? Whew, it is all a bit overwhelming, but God knew Marshall and I needed Norah in our lives. I'm so humbled by his graciousness and know I need to strive to be a better woman for Marshall...and now for Norah.
Norah's Grandma Wiley arrives tonight! HOORAY! Marshall is currently in route to pick her up from the Boston Airport. I am so excited and can hardly focus on anything. I know my mom is going to be a bundle of emotions when she meets Norah. She has been talking about her visit ever since we booked the tickets (over a couple of months ago). Her only baby now has a baby of her own. We will make sure to post pictures of her visit!
I hope you all are well. I just want to say a special thank you here to all of the people who have extended their support to us. We are so blessed to have you all in our lives.
Love to you all.
SLK
Friday, May 15, 2009
Hot Mess
Behold, the look of a little girl who has been cleaned, changed, and swaddled after expressing the contents of her bowels both into her diaper and onto the unclothed chest/stomach of her father:
There's nothing quite like the feeling of using your hand as a dam to keep your daughter's runny, seedy poop from dripping down from your stomach onto your shorts and the floor.
Oi.
There's nothing quite like the feeling of using your hand as a dam to keep your daughter's runny, seedy poop from dripping down from your stomach onto your shorts and the floor.
Oi.
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